Major life events, such as the birth of a child, marriage, relocation, the death of someone close, illness or disability, whether expected or unexpected, have a profound effect on people. Alongside work or doctoral study many of the research participants experienced significant life events that impacted the direction or quality of their lives, for example: 

 

Social scientists

 

My husband and both my daughters are [there] and I’m here and it was tough to leave, you know, [and be] just on my own… I managed to make a life for myself here as well as maintaining my family relationships back [there] - for three years I travelled [back] when I could. I wasn’t sure I could do it… the first year it was really hard. I was very, very lonely. And so the way I dealt with it was I just worked all the time … I think that is why my summers are just so precious to me because this is the time [with family] (Nellie, research-teaching position)

​

Well, we’ve decided not to go abroad. I think that’s partly because I haven’t been very well [recently diagnosed chronic illness [so] …It’s nice to stay here. I know that …I’ve got specialist care at [the Medical Centre], so it’s that security of knowing that your wellbeing is being looked after. (Elizabeth, research professional)

​

It’s been painful [relocating to the UK], but I would absolutely do it again, because I think I’m a much, much better person for it, much broader minded, much more accepting, but it’s been very difficult, in particular making friends with British women. International people? No problem. But …I still don’t have a British friend that’s female, not one. (Jennifer, research-teaching position)

 

Scientists

Ultimately [looking for a job] goes back to geographical location …We’ve got a little one here and we don’t have any family close by and so it is tough in terms of taking care and we obviously want to expand our family too, which probably puts a lot more pressure on [my partner] and in terms of balancing our work and our social lives and our lives at home together, so I think we want to move closer to home, but like I said I think it may not entirely be dictated by where …we want to go, it might just be where the job is, right? (Albert, post-PhD researcher)

​

At the moment, I work two …or three days from home because I’m still recovering from my back surgery, so I cannot sit long …and I cannot commute a lot. (Kadyna, professional)

​

My partner of 10 years has started a new full-time …job in [city name], and is looking to buy a home, but after 3 years of living in different cities and changing jobs, we have realized that we have also grown apart somewhat emotionally. Our relationship is now in question (though not ended).  I had originally planned to move out to be with my partner, but the thought of doing that without a secure job is a little scary, and I haven’t had a lot of time to look for jobs in the area with my current workloads. (Sam, professional)

 

​

Resources

The following websites provide guidance on how to cope with some of the more common life events

This is not an exhaustive list, with regard to either topic or region; however, it will help you to get started on finding supportive information as you negotiate major life events. 

 

Relocation – Home or Job

• Relocation Expert: Includes tips and checklists, planning your move, moving overseas, settling children into school, after the move…

• Family Lives: How to cope with moving house

• Go to www.forbes.com and search for articles ‘8 tips for a successful job relocation’ (Jacquelyn Smith) and ’20 questions to ask yourself before you relocate for a job’ (Jacquelyn Smith)

• Better Health Channel: Tips on making friends in a new location or situation

 

Parenthood

• Family Lives: Pregnancy and babies

• Family Lives: Guide for dads-to-be

• Raising Children: Resources for every stage of parenting

• TED Parenting Playlist: Twelve short talks about the complexities of parenthood

 

Relationship difficulties

• Relate: Support and information for all relationships

• Family Lives: Advice on divorce and separation

• Raising Children: Single parents and blended families

• Helpguide: Family and divorce

• Psychcentral: Recovery from rejection and separation

• NHS Live Well: Domestic violence support for women and men facing violence at home

 

Bereavement

• Family Lives: Coping with bereavement

• Royal College of Psychiatrists: Information for those who have been bereaved, their family and friends

• Helpguide: Grief and loss

• Family Lives: Supporting your child when someone dies

• Royal College of Psychiatrists: Helping children to cope

• Family Lives: Miscarriage and stillbirth

• Canadian Mental Health Association: http://www.cmha.ca/mental_health/grieving/#.VzBejIQrLrc strategies for helping yourself and others deal with grieving

• Mental Health America: http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/conditions/coping-loss-bereavement-and-grief strategies for you and her helping others

 

Disability and Illness

• Healthtalk: http://www.healthtalk.org/about/overview: Information about health issues, sharing people's real-life experiences via multi-media interviews

• Disabled World: How to cope with sudden illness or disability

• National Health Service (UK): Adjusting to disability

• American Psychological Association: Coping with a diagnosis of chronic illness

• Marie Curie: Living with a diagnosis of terminal illness

 

Becoming a care-giver

• Care-giver wellness 

​

​

​